Monday, June 04, 2007
i got up all upset from a very very very negative dream this morning.
i was all ready on my wedding day.
MY wedding day, gettit, so the works, all white, too - flowy white dress, glittery heels, perfect makeup, nicely done hair, manicured instead of bitten nails etc........
and the last of whoever they were went out of the room to get me some time to myself
(leaving me alone, bad mistake, as it will turn out)
and i was staring out me window at nothing in particular, me Dad walks in and just smiles as he
looks at me and we spent a few quiet moments when he suddenly turned round to face me and
asked what's wrong.
i didn't say anything, of course (didn't want to ruin the perfect lipstick i had on, i think),
just smiled back at him and shook me head.
i remembered clearly the next words he said which will then turn round all the events of
the supposedly joyous day.
'he's not THE one for you is he?'
- and that few silent moments afterwhich he took my definite, all-too-familliar stubborn silence as an indicative before i finally broke down and cried (ruining that lipstick and makeup, mind you),
unable to say anything in answer.
then came the flurry of activities as he called out to Mom and just told her to call it off, and
call the groom's side and tell them not to come over and that the whole situation will be
explained further.
Mom was ballistic as he shoo-ed her out of that door - which was the last i'd remember of
this dream, not exactly a nice parting thought, that look on her face.
the next instance i was up barely awake and crying - i think partly from being upset, and mostly
from being jolted out of bed with that scene being my last thought whilst asleep - can you
imagine how un-nice it was to get up to????
so yes, not a nice morning to start the Monday off with.
even the working week, now that i think about it.